Self- Coaching is a Process

You may have started listening to podcasts and reading books to find answers – and all it did was confused you more! Maybe you considered hiring a coach, but that is an expense you cannot afford. Having a coach is extremely beneficial but by applying self-coaching principles in business and life, the challenges can be overcome.

Hira Ali defines self-coaching as “a self-directed activity that enables you to move forward and embrace your next challenge readily and excitedly without incurring huge costs.”

Self-coaching helps you to get out of your own way – even with the assistance of a coach you need to figure out some answers yourself. This process builds self-awareness, self-reflection, confidence, enhances clarity, increases accountability, and boosts creativity and problem-solving skills.

First, you need to do a brain dump. Our minds are complex and can be filled with ideas, concerns, and problems all at once. By writing it all down you will receive some clarity – from emerging ideas to patterns. You will also identify which area of your business or life needs improvement. “If you can write down the problem clearly then the matter is half-way solved.” Charles Kettering.

Now you can start to develop an OKR (Objective and Key Results) chart. The outcomes must be stated in positive terms as your brain cannot comprehend negativity. In other words, state what you DO want to happen and NOT what you want to AVOID. Answering the how, when, what, and why questions will identify the recourses needed, the desirability, the purpose, and the process to achieve the outcome. Some questions you can ask are:

• What do I want, what else do I want?
• Why do I want these OKR’s? Does it serve my values?
• What, when, and with whom will this OKR be achieved?
• What are the required resources needed?
• How will I monitor my progress and deal with distractions?
• What is the action plan?

A limiting belief is a false belief a person holds because of making an incorrect conclusion about something. The belief can be your own or inherited from previous generations. For example, your parents told you that you are not born with a silver spoon in your mouth. You are responsible to question these beliefs as they are self-sabotaging. Ask yourself:

• Is this belief always true?
• Am I making assumptions?
• What evidence supports this belief?
• Can I consider other factors?
• Am I just following some else’s belief?
• What am I not seeing or acknowledging?
• What could be a more enabling belief?

These questions can also be asked about the things you are thinking about. Do not fall victim to your thoughts. You can’t stop the bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from making a nest in your hair.

By developing an action plan, you set yourself up for accountability. Use the OKR’s you identified to prepare the action plan. Ensure the goals are SPECIFIC, have PRIZES attached, are INDIVIDUAL, can be REVIEWED, and are INSPIRING and TIME-BOUND. Each goal must be a SPIRIT goal.

• Work out the actions, (be specific, and with deadlines), to be taken to achieve the goal.
• To move forward, at least three actions must be planned for in your diary each week.
• Celebrate your wins.

You may find it helpful to ask a trusted friend, partner, or family member to be your accountability partner throughout the process.

It is important to show yourself kindness and be patient. When you plant a seed, you don’t dig it up every five minutes to see how much it has grown. Be realistic and honest when reviewing your actions. If you didn’t achieve a goal for whatever reason, don’t begin a mental war with yourself as to why not. Be careful not to fall into the trap of excuses! Rather be honest and get over it then start the next goal.

Nobody knows you as you know yourself, you are the expert in your work and life and are creative and resourceful. Everyone’s problems are unique; therefore, they need unique solutions.

You can take responsibility for coaching yourself to overcome the challenges in your business and your life.

In hindsight, you are now developing your template for success!